I'm just kidding. Don't flatter yourself, I can't even see your face.
I had a really random thought.
Do you call your left hand your left hand and your right one your right because of their shape or their position?
Say you were born with two left hands, one of them would still be your right hand, simply because it's on the right. But technically your right hand would be your left hand because it's shaped like what your left hand's supposed to be like.
OR your right left hand could have a thumb that looked like a pinky and a pinky that looked like a thumb etc.
I'm confusing myself. What a stupid thought. This couldn't ever happen anyway.
The word 'sandwich' is a funny word.
I don't know whether to pronounce the 'ch' bit like 'ch' (as in 'beach') or 'ge' (as in 'judge').
I'm sure you all know already, but the word sandwich was invented by the Earl of Sandwich in the 18th century. He ordered some meat tucked between two pieces of bread because he didn't want to get his hands dirty while playing cards.
Oh, he didn't invent the sandwich though. God knows what they called it before the Earl of Sandwich came along.
I put some scrambled eggs on some toast, some tomatoes on top of that, and slapped another piece of toast on top and called it a sandwich.
'Hey, you're a sandwich,' I said to it.
My comedic levels are dropping. I mean, they were low to begin with, but that, that joke right there, was far below standard.
The egg and tomato made the toast soggy. I don't think I'll be able to survive without someone to cook for me.